potentially a phoenix. potentially a fly.

i want to cry until i puke. fuck everyone. no matter who calls i'm still alone, and the bottles just keep going empty on me. sobbing, retching, passing out. i want to wake up on the other side of a storm, but the thunder keeps heating the air someplace i want to be, and the cold here brings the cowshit stink from north of town. goddamn you.

trevor it's so hard. you're going to be okay. they're beautiful, and so are you. wake the fuck up. this pain is a most necessary part of actually living. scream FUCK inside your head. smile and cry at the same time, you silly schizofrenic little boy. they may never ever see you, but damn are you alone now. and so what. CHANGE IS THE ONLY CONSTANT! THIS TOO SHALL PASS! always always pass. sad and alone to happy and loved...joyous and free to pissed on and dejected. surf the heat of the middle. let it pass. let it pass as it has to. born, live and die alone. which is unity, not duality. lover of the lyrical romantic, you will be crushed by all the glittering beauty you conjure. but hey, where the hell did the phoenix come from...yep, that's right.